A Life Update

Intro

Where do I even begin? I first created this blog shortly before attending class at The Seeing Eye back in 2021. My intention with it was to write about many topics, not exclusively guide dogs, but I feel like I’ve done a less than stellar job of keeping up. It is now March of 2023, almost two years later, and I feel like I’m still trying to get off the ground. This post is an attempt to outline and summarize the goings on in my world over the past year or two, both guide dog related and otherwise. As is the case for many of us, certain key events in our lives help to shape us into the people we are and act to lead us to a direction. I feel like there have been a few events of that nature in my life over the past two years, and here are the main ones:

University

In September, 2021, I started my first semester at UFV, (University Of The Fraser Valley), and have attended for three semesters so far. None of which have been full course loads, partially due to me needing to drop a course due to Accessability concerns, and partially due to me living out of the country part-time, (more on that later), but dipping casually back into the school experience has been interesting, to put it mildly. I’ve primarily taken classes in the fine arts department; English, Psychology and one boring as all hell Philosophy course. I’m hoping that future Philosophy courses will have more to them than this one did. It was almost entirely about deconstructing arguments, and we were graded solely on our test scores. There wasn’t a single assignment in the class. This was fine for me, but I really feel for those who have test anxiety. No other opportunities to increase your grade besides the one thing you’re likely to do poorly on. It’s unfortunate, and I hope that in extreme cases, some sort of accommodation can be made for them. 

I’ve enjoyed delving back into the world of academia, and I hope to be taking on a full course load in the fall. I’m taking the winter semester off for a bit of a mental break, so I may have to take a course or two in the summer, but that remains to be seen. Truthfully, it feels weird to only be at the beginning of my postsecondary journey when many of my age mates have already graduated. I don’t regret taking the time off after high school. I was so burned out that I don’t believe I would have been able to jump into University and do it justice right away, but I still feel very behind. Everyone has their own path to follow; I try to remember that, but I wish I had possessed the mental fortitude at the time to push through it. I’m not yet sure of my major, because I’m really not sure what sort of career path I’d like to, or am able to follow. I’m testing the waters with different subjects, but I feel as though I’m running out of time. I’m pretty sure that any degree looks better than no degree on a resume, but that’s brought me little comfort thus far.

Arthur

In October of 2021, I received Arthur, my baby African Grey parrot. He’s deserving of a blog post of his own, but in short, I’d been on a wait list for a baby for a few years and was very excited to finally meet him. He came all the way from Ontario, and he’s been so neat to raise and get to know. Though he was a little shy at first, he was pretty agreeable to handle from the day I brought him home, as long as you were patient and respected his boundaries. His breeder did a wonderful job raising him. I’m very sad to have missed much of his past year of life, more on that shortly, but I’m gratified that he noticeably remembers me every time I come home. He knows many words now, and he’s over-all a cheerful and affectionate fellow, at least with me. As far as parrots go, he’s been an easy one to get along with, which is all the better for me as a novice bird owner. I’ve known since I was very young that I wanted a Grey, so he’s the fulfillment of a childhood dream, in a way. He’s a messy, loud, mischievous creature, but he’s taught me so much, and I love him just the way he is.

The Flood

In November of that same year, there was a massive flood in the Fraser Valley, and many people lost their homes and livelihoods. Both of my parents were almost killed in a landslide on their drive back down to the coast from our lake house. We, along with thousands of others, had to leave our homes and seek shelter elsewhere. We loaded up the two horses I had at home at the time and took them to a stable out of range, spent a couple of hours gathering up what possessions we could and took refuge at my brother-in-law’s parents’ place up Chilliwack Mountain. There were a lot of us in that house. It was our core five; my mother, my dad, my two sisters and I, my grandmother, My sister’s husband Sam, their two girls and a bunch of animals. There was my guide, Arwyn, my sister’s dog Bentley, Arthur my African Grey, two, maybe three cats, a rabbit and a few snakes. So, a conservative estimate of 17 souls under that roof. (Noah’s ark, anyone?) We stayed there six days or so, and though it was nice to be able to spend time with family and bond a bit, the circumstances were less than ideal. We went on outings as it was feasible. I went for a hike with Sam and brought Arwyn along, and on a different day, I went with my mother to check on the horses. For the most part, though, we were confined to the house, and as the days went by, we each rose to some level of stir-craziness. I think it was the hardest on Arthur, though. Greys are pretty neurotic birds, and it had only been about a month since he’d came to me, so this kind of a sudden change didn’t sit well with him. It was a noisy household with two young children, neither of whom were old enough to have any understanding of respect for a creature like him. Arthur screamed his heart out whenever the baby approached. He was in a cage that was too small for him, because we had neither the time nor the space to bring his big one. Unsurprisingly, he lost a lot of feathers during our evacuation, and any talking he’d begun doing ceased completely for many months afterword. Poor guy.

No summary can accurately depict the emotions felt in these moments. There were times when all I felt was numb, and I’m sure this is true for others, as well. What can you really do in that moment? You have to act, so you put aside your feelings, and come back to them when there’s more time. Time is something we didn’t have on our side. There was law enforcement going door to door to make sure the evacuation order was heard and followed. We had to leave and deal with the aftermath as best we could. We were very lucky, actually. Our houses were spared, and we didn’t lose much at all in the water. It could have been so much worse, and it was for many families. Tens of thousands of livestock perished, along with other animals in the toxic flood waters. There were cows standing shoulder-deep in water locked in dairy barns that had to be shot days later due to prolonged hypothermia. There were people who had to be rescued by boats and by helicopters, and there were looters in boats who took advantage of the misfortune of others. It was a sad time for many. From within the misery, however, kindness and resilience shone through. There was an incredible showing of community support; people helping to rescue those in need, food, clothing and belongings donated to those who’d lost everything, great efforts put forth to house and care for the animals that had been displaced,, people lined up to fill sand bags to help patch the broken levy… when it was needed, the people banded together and made a difference, and that was wonderful to see. It gave me renewed faith in humanity.

California Bound

When we got home and settled again, we were told to make preparations to move. Our property was to be sold, and we would move to a location outside of the flood zone. The timing was just so that my partner was needing to move out of home, as well, so we decided to join forces and move somewhere together in stead. On April 29th, 2022, My sister Felicia, her friend Carry, Travis and I set off with my three horses to California, where Travis and his family are from. It was a 21 1/2 hour drive with stops and hold-ups, but we did it in one shot. It was a damn long day, and we were all grateful when the horses were settled in their new paddocks and we could all get some sleep.

I lived with Travis and his family for the month of May, and though it had its awkward moments, it was all in all a good experience. They lived in a one-level peach-coloured house, so idilic of California, with a fenced yard reefed in greenery and a beautifully blue pool that made days already well into the 90s more bearable. Though it wasn’t walking distance to many retail locations, it was in a neighbourhood with sidewalks, which meant plenty of work for Arwyn. They had a little white dog named Molly, but she didn’t want anything to do with my dog, and they had a female shepherd that was pretty indifferent, as well. It was a good time. I got to know his family, while at the same time trying not to impose on their space. It was a balance that I never became entirely comfortable with, but it was a good experience to have, I think.

Wilson

I went back home for the month of June for two reasons: Without some sort of visa, a Canadian can only stay in the US for six months out of every Callander year, so I had to split up my time wisely while I could. Secondly, I went back to pick up my prospect pup, Wilson, from his breeder, (more on that later). He’s a German Shepherd from working lines, and it’s hard to believe that he’s pushing 11 months as I write this. When he was first dropped into my arms, he was this little ball of fluff no bigger than his head is now. It’s been amazing to watch him grow, and he’s not done yet. Hard to believe because he’s already 26 inches tall and pushing 80 pounds. Where he’ll finish is anyone’s guess. We’ve had our challenges along the way. He’s extremely high-energy, strong-willed, whip smart, kinda rough around the edges and questions the agenda all the damn time, but he’s got a great work ethic, is extremely loyal and tries his heart out to understand whatever it is I’m trying to teach him. I think he’ll shape up to be one heck of a dog. Not to mention, I have a nearly flawless home security system, so that’s a plus. I figure he’ll settle a bit once the boys come off, but I wanted to wait until he’s at least a year for that, and we haven’t encountered any real issues that would prevent it, I.E. marking or aggression, so we’ll hold off for a while longer, (enjoy them while you can, buddy). We’ll have many adventures, along with my future guide, whomever they may be.

I consider it very fortunate that he was able to grow up with Arwyn. She was a pretty care-free pup, willing to accept and play with pretty much anything that looked like a dog, so he never knew aggression. I’ve been very careful about the dogs and humans I’ve socialized him with, and I think the effort has paid off. Arwyn definitely instilled in him a love for labs, evidenced by his noticeable excitement every time we see one. He’s able to interact with all sorts of dogs in a reasonable manner, though we still have a ways to go with ignoring others when on-leash. I’ve never really been a fan of dog parks, but there’s one that’s not very busy near my house in BC, and I look forward to taking him there to train off-leash in the future. I feel that it could be a good potential spot for making new doggy friends for him, as I know some of the people who take their pups there on occasion.

Summer In The Sun

The horses were moved to Red Dog Ranch a few days before I returned to California with Wilson. I have yet to mention this publicly, but this may be a good place to do it. For the first two months they were in California, my horses were kept at a facility called “Infinity Farms” out in Marysville, owned by Shannon Lee Roberts. For the month I was gone, my horses were grossly neglected and did not receive the care I had paid for. They were not getting daily turn-out, were being given the wrong feed despite multiple direct attempts to rectify this with the barn owner, and Leo’s cace of Summer soars was disclosed to me only when the case was so advanced that it posed a serious risk to his health. I was left to deal with this from a distance, and I’m very grateful to Jamie and Dawn at Red Dog for taking him and the others a few days early and for doctoring him while I could not. A further complaint: Not all of my tack was recovered from Infinity Farms, and some of it was stolen. I was able to return for some of it, but there are a few expensive rein sets I never did get back. It’s rare that I leave a bad review, but I’m saying clearly here, I do not recommend this place and will have no more dealings with them. Shannon is not only a thief, but is responsible for serious animal neglect. She wouldn’t even return my calls when I was trying to have Leo treated, nor when I was trying to make arrangements to have them removed from her property. The “staff” working for her were nice enough, but no training was done on proper care of horses. I know this for sure because neither of them could even tell the difference between local grass hay and alfalfa, so nobody there knew what should be feed to whom, how much or how often. I was told to direct those questions to Shannon, who was rarely on site, almost never answered calls, and often just told me to tell her staff what I wanted, none of whom could keep it strait. This is extremely dangerous, because there are some horses who cannot eat alfalfa for health reasons. They were lucky this wasn’t the case with mine, but none of them needed it, much less needed to have it make up the entirety of their diet. The whole place was a complete debacle. Leo’s condition was entirely preventable and wouldn’t have occurred at all had he been cared for properly. There wasn’t a single soar on him when I left, and when I got back, he had wounds on him that took months to recover. I considered going after her for damages, because the vet bills weren’t cheep either, but he made a full recovery, and I hadn’t the energy being new to the area and having so much else on my plate. I didn’t even leave a review on her site, because for the longest time, I was too angry. I want whatever I say to be truthful, but coherent enough that someone might get some use out of it. Maybe now I will, after having some time to sit with my feelings. It’s crazy to me how someone can let an animal suffer like that on their watch. It was strictly a side hustle for her, and the care of the horses was not a priority in the least.

With the horses safely at a proper facility, I was able to enjoy much of the summer with them. It was a hot one, so my time at the ranch was early in the morning, by necessity. All three of them thrived on the attention, and their fitness increased with a more regular work schedule. Wilson got lots of exposure to different places and things, and I took frequent advantage of the pool that was in our new apartment complex. We moved into an apartment on King Avenue in the beginning of July, and it’s where I now sit writing this. It’s a nice, walkable neighbourhood, much closer to downtown. Though I miss the quiet, the squalling of the frogs in the pool in the evenings, and the sweet-smelling air and the birds chirping away in the mornings, it’s a lot more convenient to be able to walk almost anywhere we need to go, or to be able to catch an Uber there at the very least.

Arwyn

Every month or two, I’d fly back home to spend some time there. This is the limbo I’ve been, and am still living in. I was back home for August Long Weekend, Canadian Thanks Giving and halloween, and back again for Christmas and Travis’s and my first gig together. When I returned home in October, Arwyn officially retired from service. Her retirement date was October 12, and it was a bitter-sweet day. She loved her job, but wasn’t comfortable doing it in many of the settings she was required to work in, so retirement was the best thing for both of us. Many things had been tried to mitigate her anxiety, and both the school and myself determined after ten months of effort that it was likely in both of our best interests to call it and apply for a new guide. She Taught me so much, and I’m grateful for every day we worked together. It was hard to say goodbye, though. In November, Arwyn went to live with a friend of mine in Ontario who also has dogs from The Seeing Eye. After a boat load of agonizing over it, I felt this was best. Two dogs is a lot, but doable, and three is out of the question. Since I will be getting another guide at some point, Arwyn would have been on the back-burner, and I didn’t think that was fair to her, as she’s been front and centre in someone’s life for nearly the entirety of her own. It was a hard goodbye, for me and for Wilson. I lost a guide and friend, and he lost his favourite play mate. She’ll be missed by many over here, but I get frequent updates about her, which eases the grief a little. I know it was the right choice for all involved, and I’m so happy to see her thriving along side her two doggy pals.

Final thoughts

December was our gig at the Elements Casino in Chilliwack, it went quite well for a first kick at the can, a brutal cold snap, Christmas happenings, and I flew back into Sacrimento on December 30th. I’ve spent the last two plus months state-side, but I plan to fly home again soon and to possibly stay for my birthday. It’s been an eventful year full of new experiences, and although it hasn’t always been easy, it’s been a great learning experience. It may be that I’ll have to bring my horses back home with me later this spring an reestablish myself there, but I’ve very much enjoyed living here and would be open to possibly working towards making that happen more permanently in the future should it make sense. It’s very difficult to balance my time on both sides of the border without a visa, and getting a visa isn’t the easiest thing, either. Until I can figure out if it’s even possible for me, I need to be somewhere where I can find purpose again. Though I’ve loved my time here, one of the things I’ve struggled the most with is not being able to work. An idol mind is the devil’s workshop, and there have been times where I’ve found myself with an abundance of free time on my hands and no way to fill it. As someone who doesn’t have a huge income, I don’t have a bunch of extra money to spend fruitlessly, so excessive travel and leisure activities weren’t always an option. I’ve missed having tasks I needed to do every day, and though there are obviously draw-backs to both sides, having things required of you, a routine that is absolutely non-negotiable is good for the mind and the body. Not to mention, I miss my social circle. Not that I have a huge one back home, but very few of the relationships I’ve fostered here in Cali have turned out to be long-standing. I still plan to make frequent trips back here; I’ll just have more ties to BC, especially with the animals being under my care full-time again.

Since we’re already well above 3,500 words and will quickly approach 4,000 if I keep on like this, I’ll end it here. Writing is therapeutic for me, and I feel as though documenting events, even if they aren’t read by many, helps me to feel like I’m fulfilling a responsibility to myself. I’m not exactly sure how to explain it, but it helps. I hope to get better at updating this more regularly so I can keep these posts a bit shorter, and I’d love to cover a wider range of topics, as well. I would love to hear your ideas in the comments. 

Until next time.